In the recent months, there seems to be one question that I have been getting a lot, “how did you figure out what you wanted to do with your life?” It’s a beautiful question which triggers different reactions in my body as I hear it.
On the one side gratitude, as it implies that I am seemingly doing something ‘right’. On the other side, slight anxiety as I too am only at the beginning of my journey, I too have yet to figure out so much, I too wrestle with doubt and uncertainty.
However, whatever the side is, I can also say that while I am only certain about the fact that what I am doing in this moment is perfect for exactly that, this moment, and I am only just scratching the surface of my true flame, I can also say that I am at the very least aware of the steps that got me to this starting point.
It is with absolute joy that I share these steps with you, may they ignite your spark!
The Questions
It seems like the most obvious thing to do. The most obvious way to start, yet, somehow it is also the most overlooked first step. Simply asking YOURSELF what it is you truly want:
“What do I want to do with my life?” (The obvious and maybe hardest first one)
“How do I want to feel?” (For instance, what do you want Mondays to feel like?)
“What do I enjoy doing for free?” (What do you enjoy so much that you could do it for free with joy?)
“How can my talents and passions serve others?” (Your talents and passions are no accident)
Now, this is definitely easier said than done, and it takes more than asking yourself these questions once, twice, three or even ten times! It’s a series of questions that you will have to sit with, over, and over, and over, again. It’s asking yourself a thousand times, every day, every week, every month.
“What is it that I truly deeply want to spend most of my time doing?”
You may be struggling to find what it is you truly want to do, but have you ever actually sat down and asked Yourself?
Practical tip: Grab a piece of paper, write out these questions, take some long deep breaths and then allow yourself to answer with whatever first comes to mind, without censoring yourself in any way and allowing your pen to flow freely.
Paying Attention
Once you’ve harassed yourself with these questions, over a period of time you’ll start noticing little nudges. Maybe the smallest most seemingly simple or silly idea that just keeps popping up. ‘This thing’ that someone keeps mentioning, or ‘that flyer’ you keep passing by.
No matter how small or insignificant it may seem, I repeat no matter how small or insignificant it may seem, PAY ATTENTION TO IT. It may be as simple as picking up a book you keep stumbling upon but for some reason haven’t bought yet, it may be taking that course you can’t get out of your head but aren’t sure how it would serve you.
Whatever the sign or nudge is, listen to it. Check it out, give it some further thought. This is where things can get a bit difficult, this is where you gotta trust and listen to that gut feeling, that intuition, even if you have no idea where it’s taking you. You’ve been asking the questions, the answers are coming in.
Tuning In & Allowing
Once you start paying attention to those little nudges and little signs, once you start taking what seems to be very tiny steps, once you finally start moving in some sort of direction, no matter how big or small, this is when you start to catch that flow. You no longer follow the flow, you become the flow.
Once you start finding some sort of sense of direction, that sh*t starts to feel really good. You’ll slowly get inspired, get more ideas, want to plan things and pick up that pace. It’s a beautiful thing, and this too is where things can get tricky.
This is when you start to seek that balance of working hard and allowing. Doing and becoming still. Planning without attaching to that plan. You see a light, you’re getting a taste for what you want, a spark starts igniting, and this is when you want to really start tuning in with yourself and truly trusting yourself.
This is when you keep asking yourself the same questions you started with, this when you keep paying attention to the signs, this is when you work your ass off, and then step back and allow space for life’s creative flow. Over, and over, and over again. This is when the magic starts to happen.
This is when you start to get a taste of that alignment. That sweet taste of alignment to your vision, mission, and purpose, as you slowly start to discover whatever that vision, mission, and purpose may be.
Part of the journey to figuring out what I wanted, started with these questions and naturally unfolded into these steps. Finding myself on the brink of graduating college, not knowing what I wanted, and asking myself that question every single day.
It started with an idea to maybe explore my love for writing a little more. Which turned into maybe “I should start a blog”, which seemed silly, slightly useless (that’s not a job?!) and me asking myself who the hell would care to read that blog.
If I had listened to all of that chatter in my mind and not pursued that small seemingly ridiculous idea, I would not have explored my interests and passions a little deeper while encountering new ones along the way, I would not have discovered the joy of sharing that with others, I would not have even dared to play with the notion of starting my own business…
I would not have discovered the absolute f*cking bliss of what I get to do now. Living inspired, tuning in, following the ideas and nudges and in its simplest form… enjoying every minute of it. This is only the beginning, and I cannot wait to see where it leads to.
So I urge you, ask yourself, trust yourself, and find your fire!
Love & Light,
